Listening to Our Children
Listening is one of the best ways of helping our children and communicating our acceptance of them.
A child who is listened to feels:
- Valued
- Understood
- Respected
- Cared for
Being less directive
Instead of: Questions, blame, advice. e.g.
- "Did you do something to him first?"
- "That's what you get if you…"
- "If I were you I'd…"
Try: Listening in silence or responding non-verbally. e.g.
- Nodding
- or going "Oh" "Hmm" "I see"
Empathising
Instead of: Denying your child's feelings. e.g.
- "It can't hurt that much"
- "Don't be scared"
- "You don't really mean that"
Try: Naming the feeling. e.g.
- "That can really hurt"
- "You're feeling worried"
- "Sounds like you're very angry because…"
"I am listening more and communicating better."
"The course helped me listen more and lecture a lot less."
"I listen to the children - and they listen back!"
